I just don't feel at peace really. a friend suggested it might be cold feet about the marriage, but i know it's not that. marrying her is the one thing i'm certain of...

i just feel really tense lately. i feel stressed out and under pressure. i'm reviewing insurance paperwork thinking, no one told me being an adult was going to be this hard.

the summers are always hard. the heat gives me headaches. the lack of free time and sleep starts to drive me crazy. but something in my gut tells me that i wouldn't have it any other way.

this too will pass.

i purchased the e for explosion record, reinventing the heartbeat, which in my mind is the logical next step from jamisonparker's sleepwalker. The linking factor of course being jamison convington, who's voice (both lyrically and sonically) has grown more mature since his last outing as one half of jamisonparker. His new record is being referred to as shoegaze, which is a new term to me, but i suppose it's better than being labeled emo (another word with no meaning). I did some research on other "shoegaze" bands and the band who is credited with starting the movement that started in the 80's and died in the early 90's, my bloody valentine, aren't too bad.

anyway i'm going to be in goliad for the weekend. stay up to date on my twitter.

I've pretty much done a little bit of everything. I've worked at a television station, a fast food restaurant, as a web designer, for a construction company, for media relations and publications for swt and for two technical support companies.

I've also done a lot of dumb things as well though and I'm thankful that I made it through those times.

Over all I'd say that I have it pretty good. I'm engaged to a beautiful and smart girl, i have a loving and supportive family, I have close friends i can trust and I work at a job that I enjoy with people that I like. There's not much more I can think of that one could ask for in life...

So yeh I guess it would be correct to say that there have been ups and downs over the past twenty five years, but they've made me who i am today so I can't really complain.

... then i thought i grew up. I saw batman and robin and thought it was horrible. I thought I was too old to read comics. I heard christian bale was going to play batman and shuddered, but hoped christopher nolan could pull it off.

As everyone knows batman begins was amazing and the dark knight looks to be even better.

I started reading the dark knight returns by frank miller and it is amazing. probably his best work (i've read his other work).

anywho, i had to reset my iphone today and it was a pain.

I did a pretty sweet promotional video for D-Now this weekend. I might put it on youtube later if I feel like it.

So have you heard of E for Explosion? I had heard it was the name under which Jamison Covington, of the now defunct JamisonParker, performed under, but I had not heard any of the music until today. The songs are amazing. As sappy as some people felt Sleepwalker from JamisonParker was, I love love that record and the new E for Explosion record picks up right where it left off.

So that's about all that's going on here. Uh if anyone happens to some how magically have a version of the iPhone 2.0 firmware and wants to hit me up, please do so!!!!

Through out high school and college I wrote about unrequited love and being in college thinking it best to write what you know. To this day I still hold that motto dear, but in my new writing i couple it with a new motto, write what you understand.

I've come to the realization that I went through a lot in college and while it was all happening was probably not the best time to try and write about. Don't get me wrong writing was crucial back then and helped me through a lot, but I think my work as of late is some of my best and most poignant. Basically it's about the college version of myself and how that version of myself though my future would turn out. It's also about realizing that you don't have to be with someone to be happy.

That's probably an over simplification of everything, but I understand it in my head and that's what matters for now...

It's pretty awesome. If you're cool / smart / whatever you can read it here.

Leah and I were talking yesterday about what would happen if my novel were published and was critically well received. I've always dreamed of that possibility, but had never actually considered what would happen if it were to come to pass. I don't really know what I'd do, because in all honesty I don't think I'd be able to write another one. I said earlier I feel like this was the story I've been writing my entire life, I seriously doubt that anything I could write in a one to two year period could even begin to compare.

"but as soon as it began it was ruined, a slow descent from unique to routine..."
- "A Slow Decent" by Straylight Run

I might be cheating a little bit though as i am trying to rewrite something i wrote in college, but in a completely different and hopefully more mature way. I think in the end that the differences in the story will be comparable to two different routes to the same destination.

In all honesty i feel like the 755 words i have written in the past two days are some of the best that i've committed to the computer screen.

Perhaps soon an excerpt will grace this site.

btw: if you live in the Austin, Texas area, don't expect a physical copy tomorrow, because no one is going to have them. I'm probably going to have waterloo order a copy for me like they did with the tiger lou record.

I called ATT who explained to me that I would need to contact a different department that was only open Monday - Friday to add some sort of iPhone addendum to our account. They said that someone would call me back on Monday morning.

Monday morning finally rolls around and I have yet to have received a phone call, so i call ATT again and speak to someone in their mobility department. This person said that he would email me a form to fill out, I would then receive some emails and then I should call ATT customer support back.

I recived the emails and then as instructed called ATT back. After speaking to three or four different people I was able to speak to someone in the mobility department again, who told me that I was waiting for our new Foundation Account Numbers to be added to our account and that it should be around 24 hours before this happened, but could also possibly be in the next couple of hours. Frustrated and exhausted, I decided to wait it out.

Around 2pm I received the call back I was promised the previous Saturday. I spoke with a woman who was nice, but pretty much said there was nothing she could do except give me the phone number of the person I had been previously speaking with this morning.

I attempted to call him, but did not receive an answer. I then sent him an email asking him the status of things and explaining that I needed any help he could provide to expedite things since the phone was for a supervisor and since we spend around $2000 a month with ATT. I received a short email simply stating he was waiting for the new foundation account numbers to be attached to our account. I asked him if he knew the status this process and he said no.

Needless to say I'm very aggravated with this situation. It's not hard to take a SIM card from one phone, insert it into the new one and begin using it. I've been doing it with several blackberries and other assorted phones for years. I would expect better service from a company as large and well know as ATT, especially from their business support teams. I've personally been using cingular / ATT for seven years and never have i been treated this way.

So now i'm chillin with $1000 in phones in my desk... good times.

Allow me to rephrase, I don't let people's option of me shape my actions. If i can sleep at night because i feel that my actions are in line with my religious and moral beliefs, then let people think or say what they want about me. I would however ask that if you feel that something i am doing is wrong to respectfully bring this up to me and we can have a discussion about it.

Let me also clarify, I do care to hear what people think or say about me. Again, I don't let their thoughts or actions dictate my behavior, but I do like to know what the word on the street is about me.

I went to the dentist today and had five cavities taken care of. They numbed my entire lower jaw and i was unable to feel my tongue or speak properly.

Also some very positive things happened last night.

fin,

So Mike Huckabee conceded to McCain and I'm hoping that the insane Ron Paul will be doing the same soon.

Also in the realm of Ron Paul, in the event that he is crazy enough to go third party I have but one question for him: What did the five fingers have to say to the face?

So i've been noticing what appears to me to be a trend lately. It seems that many foreign (Canadian) bands have begun to support barak obama and plan shows to either benefit or support him. I have several political views, many of which i try to keep to myself and out of this blog, but this is just something that i don't understand. I would think that these bands would keep to themselves on the issue of our presidency, since it seems to me that American bands don't go to Canada to support potential prime ministers. Maybe i'm just being ignorant here, but I promise it's not intentionally so. If someone knows how to explain this, please feel free to email me.